Does Conforming to Gender Neutral Fashion Make Me Less "Manly"?

 

Image from Pinterest

In recent years, the right - especially the religious right - has padlock with a newfound intensity onto gender norms and have used people's clothing choices to moralize about society. In their eyes, if you are a man who dresses in a "feminine" way, or even a woman who wears a suit, you're obviously trying to destroy the holiness of the typical modern family. And all I have to say is wearing a dress doesn't make you less "manly".

Image of myself from Instagram

Now what I really want to know is does conforming to gender neutral fashion make me less of a man or rather less "manly"? before I tackle this question, we must ask ourselves what masculinity is? In society, culture, and traditional virtues, a "manly man" has been described as independent, dominant, tough, muscular, and strong both physically and emotionally. 

It is very important to put the emphasis on the emotional strength because it has been so ingrained into the minds of most young man and boys including myself that we must have control over our feelings and have an emotionless approach in life, that is why the term "boys don't cry" is an example of this. My uncle once said to me "I am too emotional and that sometimes clouds my judgement, that is why I make a lot of bad decisions" I swear if it wasn't for the respect, I have for him I would’ve slap the shit out of him. He is a bigot and the biggest misogynist I know. 

These aggressive and slightly invasive male social type of standards and expectations are not only harmful to society but to whom it is ascribe to as well. I honestly think and it even might be scientifically proven that man who stick to said masculine standards or norms show a most likely tendency to experience psychological problems such as stress, depression, body insecurities, substance abuse and just overall poor social functioning, this is all without even mentioning the effects of these type of violent traits to the opposing gender. 

 That's hectic right? I know. And I know the perfect term for this I mean we all do - TOXIC MASCULINITY another term is hypermasculinity and this has become a topic of conversations and debate in modern times.  So, we can totally understand why it is prohibited in society when man step out of these stereotypes and explore fashion from a gender-neutral view.

This implies wearing "feminine" garments or even makeup as well nail polish. A recent example of this is the controversy of singer Harry Styles, who is the first solo male to feature on the cover of vogue. And he was the one who inspired me to step out of my comfort zone and express myself. 

Harry Styles by Getty Images

And he also inspired my own very vogue cover photo I took myself. A black boy can dream, can't he? so my final thoughts is that I do not think wearing neutral fashion or "feminine" clothing or makeup makes you less of a man. I will not let whoever came up these stereotypes deny my prevalence of creativity. Fashion and perception of manliness has evolved and changed all throughout the years, trends come and go. I who defy these gender norms and taboo boundaries have become subject of ridicule. I have the right to freely express myself however I feel like.  

Image of myself, Inspired by Harry Styles Met Gala look 2019

Everyone should be able to dress as they wish because attire, makeup and self-care is not available to only one gender. But with, this isn't meant to impose upon men that they must dress in a more "feminine" manner, the point of this is just to show that you have the freedom to dress yourself as you wish. We simply shouldn't feel oppressed by what others wear. Just be yourself, and be LESS shitty! 

Harry Styles attends the 2019 Met Gala / Getty Images for The Met Gala Museum